Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Stella Winter; 22 months old

Stella Winter

22 months old and with a personality bigger and brighter than ever. Stella is certainly the light that brightens our skies.

I have so much confidence in the big sister she is soon to become. Her confidence, helpfulness and willingness to please will be traits that make her a joy to have share the experience with.

Her self-awareness has grown in incredible leaps and bounds lately, not only has she figured out the world around her, but also how it works in relation to her. She points a little chubby finger to her chest and proclaims "Sdella" with pride. Everything in Stellas little world has a place, a purpose and a meaning, and watching that deeper level of understanding unfold has been a precious experience. With understanding has come an abundance of questions and queries, she is forever asking what things are and who people are. Her favourite game to play is called "Name that thing"... where she points to an object and tells us what it is and what it does. This game can seriously go on for hours.

Following me around the house I hear "Beep, beep, beeeep. Washing machine? Sdella help, outside? Boots on, Ok mummy!" Her little toddler speak and disjointed sentences are one of my most loved sounds. She commentates our lives with her sweet little voice, making every mundane task seem like an exciting adventure.

This later stage of toddlerhood has been challenging on my patience and physical energy more than anything. Emotionally, she is a dream. We certainly get a fair share of tantrums and defiance, but nothing that can't be calmed with tact and experimentation. If our week is a total tantrum throwing frenzy, it is usually for a good reason. Either she is struggling to master a new physical milestone or is reacting to something going on around her that she simply doesn't understand; why mum can hold a hot cup of coffee and she can't, why she can't have a banana in her hand whilst playing with her toys or why toilet paper shouldn't be ripped up into tiny little pieces. With a deep, calm breath and a lot of trial and error situations can be diffused prettily easily and permanently over the course of a few days.

However, keeping up with this little spark of light can be one big physical challenge. Perhaps it is just the large bump that I am carrying around causing the puffed out sighs and sleepy yawns when Stellas little chubby hand reaches up for mine. "Come on, mama" she pleads with me. I find that struggling to stay energised and motivated for such long days of intense exploring really have an effect on my self esteem as a mother. I feel guilt ridden and saddened that I am perhaps not giving her all that I could.

Despite the struggle, I still find such joy in my days spent with Stella. The way her face lights up when she hears any kind of music, the way she tugs at my arms to sing "row row", the way she looks up in awe and whispers at the stars when the sky is dark.

That is my Stella, the Latin meaning of Star. She lights up my each and every moment.

Stella Winter
Stella Winter

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