Our Journey; Post 5

Can you believe it! Week 31 is upon us, the final countdown is officially on! It really does only feel like yesterday that I announced my pregnancy to the world. Although it has flown by, I can't remember what it feels like to bend down without huffing or what my knees look like.

The above image is one of the very few I have snapped of my bump in the last four weeks, and it captures how I am feeling perfectly. A little flat, a little puffy, a little frustrated and a lot tired. I have become increasingly frustrated with how physically incapable I am of getting things done, How can a busy busy mama possibly slow down!

Despite my frustrations and exhaustion, I am still eagerly awaiting the arrival of our baby with my all. A small corner of our bedroom has become her sweet little nook with neutral colours and a whimsical feel, I often lay in bed and stare at the space she will soon occupy, wondering what our lives will be like. Her abundance of shoes are lined up neatly in the drawers waiting for her little feet to fill them, the swaddles and blankets have been ironed and folded neatly, waiting to be wrapped around her warm little body. I feel confident in saying we are almost completely ready for her arrival, with only a few small items to tick off the list and prepare.

The labour jitters are certainly upon me, and I swear they are responsible for the pregnancy insomnia that pays a visit every night. With my first labour, I felt that I was physically fit and that my body was ready to give birth. I was exercising regularly and rarely ever sat still and I think this played a large part in how smoothly and quickly my labour travelled. This time, however, is a totally different story. I am unsure how my unfit body will perform with the challenging task ahead of it. A birth plan from a few months back has been drafted and stashed away amongst a pile of papers in a deep drawer, I really must pull it out again soon and re-evaluate my goals, wishes and preferences.

Lately, Stella has taken to pointing at all the new baby items around our house and exclaiming "The babys'!". She doesn't seem to mind that a few of her baby items have now been reclaimed, as she has got grown-up girl items in replacement. I am confident in her ability to be a wonderful big sister, although still very concerned about how I am going to juggle the tasks revolved around looking after two children. I want nothing more than equality between my girls, and it is something that is often on my mind. How to best create this equality and spread my love, time and devotion evenly. This is something I have written about this previously, wondering how far my heart can stretch and pondering all that is involved with going from one child to two.

Birthing and parenting classes at our local hospital start next week, and in all honesty... I couldn't be more excited! Put me in a room full of big bellies and plastic demonstration dolls on a Thursday night over a cocktail in a bar anytime! I am in desperate need of a refresher when it comes to the stages of labour, pain relief methods and settling techniques for newborns. It will be interesting to see if the second time around really does come with more confidence, because at times I feel like nothing more than a 'newbie' all over again. The thought of holding a tiny newborn baby and bringing her home not only excites me, but terrifies me all the same.

As I sit here now, I can't imagine how our lives will be in nine weeks time. Busier, more intense, more challenging but also far more enriched. These nine weeks will fly by, and then... I shall be a mama of two. Oh. My. Gosh!

Looking forward to sharing with you the very last leg of our journey! 
Plenty of love,